


Mistakes and Regrets

by sorrysenpai



Category: Purple Hyacinth - Ephemerys & Sophism (Webcomic)
Genre: Annoyed Lauren, Archivist Kieran, Comfort, Corridor Convos, Dickhead Hermann, F/M, Hermann being Hermann, Kym being Kym, Lauki at the office, Lauren being Lauren, Office Conversations, Soft Kieran, fluff maybe, fluff?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:35:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26568895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sorrysenpai/pseuds/sorrysenpai
Summary: After all this time, one mistake is all that it takes...?
Relationships: Lauren Sinclair & Kieran White
Comments: 7
Kudos: 44





	Mistakes and Regrets

**Author's Note:**

> Tip: Listen to Ophelia by The Lumineers and read :)

Something was up in the office today. The investigation unit knew something. Something important, a new lead on the topic. Hermann had barged into the office, with his usual pissy demeanor, followed by March who was, calm as usual, holding a file, a surprisingly thick one. There was a lot of yelling, a lot of frustration. The events were similar to the day when Lune’s first file had dropped in. Two officers were called out, Kym and Will specifically, and when Lauren tried to follow, she was halted harshly by Hermann’s ugly scowl. _Not you Sinclair, I want you to stay here and let them take care. They can do it and we don’t need you,_ were his words. 

  
  
  
  


The memory repeated in her head over and over again, like a stuck disk. The scowl, the tone when he spoke, the utter hatred dripping off of it. The emotion was mutual, probably the only similarity between them was their feeling of utter _loathe_ towards each other. Craving to be alone, Lauren turned to an empty corridor, and leaned heavily on the wall, with arms crossed. Her brows drew together, a frown finding its way on her forehead. Thoughts took and negative turn and she was anything but _okay_. 

_After all this time, and energy spent, and yet...Why?_

Her head moved from the memory, towards pondering and reliving the mistake made more than a year ago. The yelling replayed in her head as if there was no tomorrow. And then she was greeted with another presence. She could sense Kym standing by the edge of the wall, unlike that day when she managed to sneak up on Lauren when she was in a similar situation, just that it was outside the precinct. _And_ she was in the dilemma of turning Kieran in or not. 

“Look, it’s not a big deal…” Her voice trailed off as she opened her eyes to look at her, only to realize that the presence was not Kym. 

Kieran stood not too far from her, probably a couple of feet. Arms crossed across his chest, leaning on the wall, head tilted towards it. His “charming” aura was on, bolstered by the sunlight from the window, which was getting stronger and spilling all over them. Well, _mostly_ him. A few rays reflected from his glasses to the walls. No emotion rested on his face as he muttered a small ‘Hey’ to the officer, but the gentle look in his gaze gave the mask of indifference away. 

“Ah, it’s you,” Lauren said, her voice taking a bitter, nonchalant tone once she took notice of him. She looked away, at the window in front of her, as if the brightness would block out his existence. 

“Don’t be so disappointed, I’m just a coworker, now,” his signature smirk found its way on his lips, and disappeared as quickly and settled to a small smile, like clouds dimming out the harsh rays during summer. 

Lauren scoffed. _Really wanna play it that way now?_ “Well then, Mr “Coworker”, you can leave me alone” she deadpanned, her tone now sharp and clipped. _Rough_ as the waves at the triangle of death.

Kieran let out a sigh as he turned to join the officer. Looking at particularly nothing outside the window. They stayed quiet for a long moment, none of them engaging or encouraging the conversation further, Lauren ignoring and him acknowledging the her presence. 

Slowly, his gaze shifted over to her, who was still looking ahead.

“You know, let's be strangers for a moment, and from a colleague to colleague, why don’t you tell me your regrets, hm? How’s the sound of that?”

“Bad,” she replied instantly, almost not letting him finish his question. She wasn’t having it. None of it, no conversation or any form of bantering, nothing. She didn’t want it.

And he could see this one coming. Lauren when she was mad was not someone you would want to mess with after all.

He let out a chuckle, eyes traveling up to the ceiling, then dropping down gradually before facing forward again. The conversation took yet another pause making the voices from either ends of the hallways prominent, and then she spoke up before the quietness started flooding over them like they were shore and this was high tide. 

“I just don’t get it, how long? How long am I going to be stuck in one place just for the sake of, I don’t know, pride?” she paused to take in a breath before continuing. Her tone was a mix of bored and annoyed. Well, more on the latter’s side. _Classic her when frustrated._

“It’s frustrating, just why? Why not just hear me out one time?” She continued, her arms fell by her side, as her body dragged to the floor till she was crouched against the wall, and her arms wrapped around her knees.

“After all this time, and effort, and perfection, all it takes is one mistake and it all falls down,” she finished, having nothing more to say. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes, trying to focus on nothing, not Hermann, nothing related to her being demoted, and think more of the other things that were needed for the present. She will have to forget about it, can’t let the day get affected just like that, there were other things to take care of. 

But after a moment or so, she felt Kieran shift next to her, mirroring her movements and settling down next to her. Lauren opened one eye to take a look at what he was up to. He was looking straight ahead. Thinking nothing much of it, she was about to close her eyes again, when he started speaking. 

His eyes never left the windowpane as he spoke up. “Well, we’ve barely worked for months but I’ve known you for long enough to know you have the talent, and it’s quite futile for you, out of everyone, to not be in the investigation unit-- _No, d-don’t make that face, no--_ I’m not saying you’re a bad officer, mind you.”

“All I’m saying is, it’s their loss,” He finished. Kieran looked back at her, and she was frowning.

_It’s their loss, anyway._ An image of a shrugging Kym flashed for a brief second in her mind, as she processed what Kieran was saying.

_Not lying._

“I agree that it’s unprofessional for him to base his actions just for the sake of pride, however...”, He trailed off for a second. She was still frowning, no response from her, so Kieran continued. “However, I can’t necessarily say that you don’t act on impulse sometimes. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not _implying_ that, that’s the reason you got kicked off the squad.” He paused again to see her reaction, but she didn't say anything. Her eyes narrowed instead as if asking him to _go on._

“With all due respect, Lauren, I think you just... _panic_ at the wrong moments.” he finished, suddenly nervous and hoping his words didn’t seem _off._

Lauren had a blank look on her face. She was quiet, and that made Kieran rethink his words. The silence was a dread for him, cause it was at times like these he didn’t know what to expect from her. But then the apprehension immediately cleared away when she spoke up. 

“You’re terrible at consoling people,” she said in a single go. He blinked, then back was his chuckle and she looked done with him, _so, so done_. And back was the ‘Bruh’ face she’d make at his jokes. His laughter dissipated to a soft smile, which she didn’t notice cause she wasn’t facing him anymore. 

“Oh darling, I’m afraid I don’t do this every day but believe me when I say, I’m working on it.” Their eyes met, none of them bothering to look away. 

“Well, it wasn’t pretty bad for someone who doesn’t relate, considering I doubt you even know what it’s like,” Then she turned away, and left him frowning.

Although she looked away, his eyes never left her, and she could clearly feel his gaze, so she leaned her head back again and closed her eyes, pretending that there was nobody. Though she could pretend, she could still feel his eyes on her, and Kieran was not going to take them off, no. 

He noticed a lot of things about her, a few little details, here and there. The way her face lit up when Lila was in sight, the subtle frown when Hermann was in the room, the glint of harmlessness when someone called out to her, the way her hand glided over to her gun when she needed it, the tired smile she gave out of courtesy when returning from a patrol. And right now, again, here she was. She was at peace, trying to get things off. Her face illuminated by the light, hair pulled back, drooping down her neck and hanging lazily at the shoulders. Her dark circles were less prominent than the last time, indicating she’s getting better sleep.

Here she is, not running on the roofs, not beating him up. Just Lauren being Lauren.

Reality then hit him like a truck when he realized that he was staring, but instead of looking away, he decided to speak up. 

“Well, I beg to differ, because I may have the idea of how you are feeling right now.”

She turned towards him, eyes snapping open, narrowing in his direction. And now it was his turn to look away. 

“Pray tell.”

He raised an eyebrow when he faced her. He took in a deep breath before tilting his face slightly, eyes never diverting from hers. He exhaled, a hint of sorrow looming in his gaze, then he spoke quietly. 

“One mistake is all that it took, and I’m no longer your subordinate, am I?”

His voice was so quiet when he spoke, yet somehow, it was the only thing she heard for a moment. Lauren was taken aback. Because that was an answer she did not see coming. It was as if time stopped, and everything around them got sucked into haze, everything, but them, and just like the light through a crack in murk darkness his voice was the only thing that was out there. He stirred something in her, that made her gulp, not in fear, but at the unforeseen nature of it. She didn't know what to say, or how to react, but it moved something in her. The light around them dimmed as the clouds took over, making the small rays reflecting off his glasses disappear, but their gaze continued to clash, and the moment remained frozen. 

Then there were more voices at the end of the corridor, opposite from where they were seated. Lauren registered Kym's voice from the rest of them as she heard her call her name. The moment shattered, and the haze cleared up. Lauren got up, stumbling a little as her body recovered from the sudden motion. Kym ran down and was there in a moment, throwing her arms around Lauren. 

“Lauren!! What are you doing here?” she looked up at her. Lauren, still recovering from the strange sensation that had just left her, didn’t really know what to say, or why she was with Kieran. 

“Well, nothing, I was with--” she turned, expecting him to be up and greeting Kym, but when she turned to look at him, he was no longer there _._

_Huh?_

“With who? Your ghost?” Kym laughed. Lauren unintentionally let out a fake chuckle as she lost focus for a brief second. She looked back at Kym, who was still laughing. Her confusion was getting the best of her, but seeing her happy friend, she decided to brush it off and joined in with the laugh, a real one this time. 

“Actually, yes. It was a ghost.” Looping her arm around Kym’s shoulders they both walked back to the office. Kym, as always, took notice of Hermann’s effect on her friend, so the conversation shifted there for a second before Lauren brushed the thought off, and they walked away.

  
  
  
  


As for him, Kieran had slipped away as soon as he got the chance. He wasn’t trying to hide, or spy for a matter of fact, but Lauren was happiest when she was around people she cared for. So he got away the moment Kym started running. He was there, hidden behind the wall they were just leaning on. He heard them laugh, heard the conversations, and how they took a turn gradually. Heard _her_ laugh. He let the smile he had been holding back form on his face and stayed there for a while, grasping in the scenario playing, till the laughter from both women ceased and he heard them walk away, then he proceeded back to where he was initially headed to. 

**Author's Note:**

> Just a mere observation that became a fic...😅🤷♀️
> 
> No really 😅
> 
> [Notice how Lauren dreads over the, “One mistake is all that it takes,” point, over her losing her rank as a detective and not being able to get it back despite an year passing away?
> 
> Well, I realised that now Kieran actually relates to what she feels considering, “One mistake (ep 43) is all that it took,” and now he’s no longer her subordinate.]
> 
> Do leave Kudos, Comments are welcome,
> 
> Thanks for Reading, 
> 
> -V


End file.
